Thursday 27 September 2007

Magic Rabbits Find a Cure for Road Rage

I was pleasantly surprised to when browsing the blog of ace magician Dave Jay yesterday.
It seems that The Mighty Jay is sometimes apt to suffer from, ahem, road rage.
However, after listening to my audio course 'Ask to Relax' he blogged, 'Superb course and well worth the money. If it can cure my road rage it's got to be good!!!'
Magic.

Thursday 20 September 2007

It's easy to be happy - when you remember!

It’s easy enough to be happy, peaceful and positive, right?
No, I’m serious. It’s easy enough to be happy, peaceful and positive - when you remember to be. But we don’t always get to remember.
Take this morning. I went into the kitchen to make myself a cup of tea. I turned on the tap and blam! I had knocked a filter jug full of water off the worktop. Right onto the floor. Oh man!
Now, I knew who had left it there. I knew that it was far too near the edge of the worktop for safety, and I knew that they always do that and that it was an accident waiting to happen and that -
But hang on a moment, I interrupted my usual reaction when accidents happen - finding someone to blame - did anyone actually die here?
Another part of my self had jumped in. I’d like to call it my ‘sane self’. How would I feel about this tomorrow? Actually I probably wouldn’t even remember the event. Maybe I’d be a little careful next time even. Maybe I could actually even learn something from this...

Monday 10 September 2007

Ask to Relax

What if there was a simple technique which could radically help you to overcome unwanted feelings and emotions almost instantly? Even better, what if you could also create positive emotions whenever you choose?
What if you could learn the basics for free, in minutes, to see if it appeals to you?
What if I stopped asking questions and gave you the link to my new, ahem, 'technique'?
What if you clicked here?

Wednesday 5 September 2007

He's a flippin' mentalist

Never being one to refuse a challenge I jumped at the chance of experiencing a little 'close-up magic' with Welsh magician Dave Jay.
I must admit I was utterly banjaxed by his sleight of hand, and this in a one-to-one session with him a mere two feet away. What really sets him apart from the rest of the crowd though is the way he both makes you laugh, mystified and surprised at the same time. It's a very unusual experience.
I remember doing at least three double-takes. Utterly discombobulated, missus.
Anyone who's considering booking an 'event' should click here.

Thursday 9 August 2007

Daleks

I went to see a Dalek skin specialist.
'Exfoliate! Exfoliate!'

Tuesday 17 July 2007

It's what he would've wanted

Went to a taxi-driver's funeral yesterday.
The hearse double parked outside the house and beeped the horn to let the mourners know he was there.

Thursday 5 July 2007

iPhoney

You can trust the bbc right? Not only have they established that Cardiff is on a space-time rift but that Kylie Minogue will visit the land of her fathers for the next Dr Who Christmas special. Hurray!
Clicking their comprehensive iPhone review reveals in-depth details of the phone's styling, user interface, blah blah blah.
Just one small detail then; using it as a phone...
'Sadly, I can't comment on this as we weren't in a position to make any calls.'
Pah.

Monday 2 July 2007

Swedish delights

There is nothing quite as lovely as a new glass-topped desk from Ikea on a Monday morning. Ah, such style, such Swedish elegance.
It's a pity that no-one told me that my mouse wouldn't work on it; it thinks it's floating in mid-air and can't get a grip on it's coordinates. Know how it feels.
All those mousemats I've thrown away over the years too.

Thursday 7 June 2007

your Stars

Emporium - the scone collector
Lucky foodstuff - wholemeal bread
Lucky building material - cement
Fortuitous transcendental irrational real number - 3.142
Lucky pet - hamster

Friday 25 May 2007

30 minutes to transform your Welsh?

Can my short audio download really fast-forward your Welsh speaking skills in under 30 minutes?
And does it really only cost £7.50?
It's the first Welsh lesson I've recorded since Cadw Swn, and that was 7 years ago. There's no postage, you can listen to it instantly, and it covers both North and South Wales Welsh.
W i wedi cyffro. (I'm excited).
Click here to find out more.

Monday 14 May 2007

Sir James, Lady Charlotte, and me...

So who was King Arthur, where exactly was he born, and did he really even exist?
Don't ask me, it's too long ago matey, but this fabulous book of Arthurian legends might shed some light.
It's a collection of tales by Sir James Knowles, Lady Charlotte Guest and (ahem) myself. Beautifully illustrated by modern master Howard David Johnson it's a delight from start to finish.
You can click here to be utterly amazed.

Sunday 6 May 2007

Your Stars

Anorack - The toad collector
A bracing week ahead - watch out for hollow laughter.
Lucky soap - lifeboy
Lucky number - 3.2561
Lucky foodstuff - monosodium glutamate

Friday 4 May 2007

Shwmae butty

Those of you who have an interest in learning Welsh may care to take a look at my new blog-type entity now online and upstream.
For the rest of you I'll have a moan about windows vista...
Yes, I am spoiled with a Mac, but I actually get on with Windows XP quite finely, thank you. Vista, however, is a more troublesome beast. I don't know if it's the firewall/antivirus suite that it ships with but continually being asked if you want to allow a program to run strikes me as rather, well, 20th century. Hah. The virus checker/firestarter even asks if its ok to run itself. So once again - hah.
But at least it does run on vista. A number of the programs which came ready-installed on a friend's PC don't even seem to work on microsoft's new 'operating system'. Now that would just make me mad.

Sunday 29 April 2007

Something Wonderful...

The ones that got away. The band that revealed the lie of the 'true talent always succeeds' truth.
A mere 26 years since driving off a self-induced sheer drop into Obliviation the Greatest Band That Never Was have somehow managed to stick themselves together long enough to reform.
Welcome back The Only Ones. It'll never last, of course, but good luck to them all.
For today there is a god.

Tuesday 24 April 2007

Change the world anyone?

Call me a hippy, call me a cab, but recent events in my timeslot have made me think that we can use this internet for the better.
Yesterday, I decided to spend the day changing the planet, rather than my underwear.
So 24 hours and £8.89 later www.weloveyouall.com is born. Go there now, and tell me just what is so funny about peace, love and understanding.
Then tell your friends. Because you'll really want to.

Thursday 5 April 2007

A Rock Star Ate My Hamster...

...perhaps my finest video game, was released either in 1988 or 1989 depending on which website you view. I'd certainly been working on it in 1988, but I think it first came out in 1989. The wikipedia entry suggests 1988, but it was a long time ago whatever fish you're frying.
I do remember that it was just about today in that year I found that the game had been 'taken off the shelves' of WH Smith and Boots the Chemist. That's banned to you and me.
I seem to remember that someone's father objected to a joke in the packaging (a spoof newspaper) which went something like 'Long John Silver 0 - Douglas Bader 0'. Douglas Bader was a war hero who lost both legs in a pre-war flying accident.
I think that the game was 'off the shelves' for a number of weeks, although one store did offer to sell it to me 'under the counter'. Hah. Condsidering some of the magazines which were on sale in Smiths at the time (firearms anyone?) I muttered inconsolably and saw love's labours lost. Easter was a good time for video game sales, as today's UK wii shortage shows to go, so I lost a few bob.
Eventually the game was reshelved without the newspaper insert. Was the world a better place? Were we saved by banning a few jokes? Were we f**k.

Friday 23 March 2007

Hey you

Two books out in a week. Flippin 'eck, now I'm tired.
But enough of me, how are you? Fancy a free ebook? Simply go to www.cleverbeing.com now. Don't run away, it's very good. It's all about getting more out of your day you know.
No, come back...

Tuesday 20 March 2007

Invisible backing singers

How could they do this to us? Not only content with producing the worst ever ever Eurovision entry (well since last year's 'UK' entry) Scooch admit to using 'invisible backing singers' on Saturday's night of misery for music lovers everywhere.
"It is difficult to sing while running around doing dance routines," the band's spokesman said. Good lord yes. Now that would take talent.

Monday 19 March 2007

Salty Nuts

The Irish, of course, take it seriously. Given the chance the Scots, Welsh and Cornish would do so too. There are nations who would kill to be represented on a huge musical stage.
Alas, once again the dodgy Union-Jack branded (ahem) 'UK' (how it hurts me to type those initials) has shown its disdain for all things foreign. Yes it's Eurovision, it's Scooch, and if you ask me if I want your salty nuts down my throat again I'll be sick in your top pocket.
'something to suck on for landing' indeed.

Friday 2 March 2007

March the second - share tips

Sell all your shares in Welsh Cakes, leeks and lavabread.
CSI Porthcawl starts tonight on UK Welsh. Cedwch eich ffydd.

Monday 26 February 2007

Great googlie-mooglies

I wonder how that happened?
My previous post on Clever Being seems to have worked. It was only last Friday that I posted a link to my mysterious new project on this very same webslot.
A google search for 'clever being' today ranks the website at number one.
Still very little (but not nothing) to see there though.

Friday 23 February 2007

Nothing to see here...

It's not because I have to show off.
It's not because I'm excited.
No, no, no, Nanette.
You see a new website has to be linked to as soon as possible to start registering with the search engines.
So please don't go to www.cleverbeing.com now. No really. There's nothing to see there yet. Nice logo though.

Monday 29 January 2007

Fromaged off

That's the last time I join a Cheese-of-the-Month club.
So I forgot to let them know that I didn't want this month's selection.
So I went on holiday for a few months.
Pah!

Thursday 11 January 2007

Instant Karma

Billy Triangle ripped to attention as the speakers blared 'Lovely Rita' across the Macworld exhibition hall. 'Beatles on iTunes?' phased across half the windswept auditorium. Um.
You've got to admit, it's getting better.