Monday, 31 January 2005

I got no strings.

My new wireless broadband from Wanadoo arrived today, and I must say it's revolutionary. I now know how Pinocchio must have felt when he left his strings behind. Nice.

Wednesday, 26 January 2005


Finally finished submitting tax return using the inland revenue's online service. My God it was slow today. No doubt many millions of panic-stricken fools like me were desperate to complete their returns before the financial penalties started. Who knows what the load will be on the site in the next few days.
I don't remember working at the computer quite this late for some time; the last that springs to mind was writing the code for Mel Croucher's unique Deus ex Machina interactive film. The soundtrack of Frankie Howard, Ian Dury and Jon Pertwee echoed around me as I struggled to meet the C64 programming deadline. Happy days.

Monday, 17 January 2005

The Wrong Thing

The questionable act of the 3rd in line to the English throne dressing up as a Nazi has prompted the premature launch of my online journal of the unfortunate, unwise, and just plain stupid. Go to '' to see the first twitches of a handwringing glee.

Wednesday, 12 January 2005

careful with that axe, Eugene

I remember someone telling me about some hypnosis tapes they'd bought. Each had a message printed on them 'do not play while driving'. Call me stupid.
A frozen pizza comes with the message 'filling will be hot when removed from oven' and a candle 'caution; fire may burn'. Everyone, it seems, has to cover themselves against consumer terrorist lawsuit firebomb attacks.
'Look, it's yours now, we've had your money. Be careful, but don't blame us. We are not respinsible. For anything.' would suit me fine.

Monday, 10 January 2005

new life, glowing

Like a warm pasty fresh from the microwave. Feel the pastry warming as the heat slowly reaches out from its molten core like a new life, glowing.
A bit late, but welcome to 2005. Some of us are a bit slow coming round you know.